Ask yourself, “What do I want people to say about me after I pass?” You may want them to talk about how well you played the piano, or how many dogs you took in from the local shelter. You may realize that your priorities included sharing music with others and helping animals. If you’re having trouble figuring out your priorities, consider how much time you spent doing particular activities. Don’t criticize yourself for not spending as much time on a priority as you would have liked.
Consider how each of your roles fits in with your priorities to help you decide what you want to focus on in your eulogy. Don’t worry about focusing on too many or too few roles. For example, some people may have focused their lives on encompassing one role, such as parent or entrepreneur. Others, on the other hand, may have moved through various roles at different stages of their lives.
Answer the question “Who is [your name]?” Start by writing down the first five things you think of when you think about yourself. Group your characteristics into categories to help you condense them into meaningful references in your eulogy.
Prioritize the accomplishments that are the most meaningful to you, such as graduating college, having your children, or writing a book. If you’re having trouble deciding what to include, go back to your list of life priorities and roles. Choose the accomplishments that reflect what you value most.
If you find out that several people share the same favorite memory, then consider including that in your eulogy. This is a great opportunity to share warm moments with friends and family, remembering good times together.
Is there a story that all of your friends have heard you tell so many times that they can finish your sentences? Think of the stories about yourself that you tell most often and how you can weave them into your eulogy. Plan to add some lesser told stories as well.
Consider incorporating more than one tone at different points in the eulogy to capture the feeling of what you’re sharing in a particular story or accomplishment. Think about who will be delivering your eulogy when choosing your tone. Some people may feel uncomfortable with or unable to convey a particular tone.
When you provide your biography, remember your audience, which will likely include those closest to you. They likely know a lot about you already, so focus on filling in the gaps about what they don’t know, such as where you spent your childhood or the nickname that your parents called you when you were growing up.
Plan to incorporate at least 3-4 stories that illustrate who you are.
Consider getting someone to read over your eulogy and help you with editing. If you know who you want to read the eulogy, it’s a good idea to have them look it over. That way, they can provide some advice on what to change or ask questions if they aren’t sure what something means.
