Not sure how to approach someone? Have a mutual friend introduce you. You’ll already have something in common: your shared friend!
You might even consider joining a new club or organization that interests you. Have you always loved art but never had a chance to join the art club at school? Join it now!
If you don’t know where to start, comment on a shared experience in the class. If you thought the homework last night was impossible, you could say, “That assignment last night really killed me. How was it for you?”
You could go bowling, head to a movie, have a sunset picnic, or play glow-in-the-dark putt putt golf! Don’t be afraid to think outside the box. Think about what your crush likes to do. If they’re really into swimming, you could visit a water park or go for a dip in your local lake. If you’re nervous about keeping up the conversation, go for a date activity where you won’t have to talk the whole time, like a soccer game or a movie. [4] X Research source
You might say, “Hey, I was thinking we could do something together this weekend, like go bowling or check out the carnival. What do you think?”
Say something like, “Ok, I get it. Just thought I’d ask. ”
Too little eye contact can make it seem like you’re bored, but too much can look really intense or even a little crazy. Look into their eyes, but take breaks periodically to look elsewhere, too.
Think about your date’s interests. Are they a huge fan of volleyball? Ask them how their most recent tournament went and share a few sports stories of your own. There are tons of conversation topics out there. You could talk about movies, music, your favorite foods, or that one annoying teacher you both have.
Pretending to be someone you’re not may work for a little while, but it’ll come back to bite you later.
Ask follow up questions, too. If your date just told you how they love to ride horses, you could say something like, “I’ve never ridden a horse. What’s it like?”
Unwanted touching or groping is a big no-no. Always ask before engaging in any sort of physical contact.
It’s a good idea to turn your phone on silent to avoid annoying interruptions. Nothing brings down the mood like a phone call in the middle of an intimate conversation. You may find it helpful to put your phone facedown on the other end of the table or in your pocket or backpack.
Stay active in any sports teams, clubs, or activities that you were involved in before you started dating. Quality time means engaging in meaningful interactions with others. It could be something as simple as eating a meal together or having a good conversation.
Being honest doesn’t mean being rude or mean. It means communicating your feelings clearly and calmly and letting your partner do the same. When possible, talk in person. Things can get lost in translation over texting or social media.
Use “I” statements to avoid blaming or accusing your partner. For example, you could say, “I feel hurt when you ignore me in front of your family. ” Remember, you shouldn’t try to “win” every argument–it’s not a competition.
Try to meet in the middle. If your partner wants to go to the school play but you want to go to your friend’s bonfire, go to each for a little bit. Take turns making sacrifices for one another. Maybe your partner is really busy, but you need them to run an errand for you. Instead of getting upset when they protest, offer to do something for them in return, like driving their little sibling to soccer practice.
You should talk with your partner about sexual boundaries, consent, and safe sex if necessary. Being shy isn’t an excuse! There is too much at stake. This isn’t a one and done conversation. You should always lay out sexual boundaries before getting physical, but you should continue to communicate during and after your sexual experiences, too. You might say, “Can we try ___?” or, “I don’t like the way that feels. Can we try something else?”
You don’t have to become best friends with your partner’s friends, but you should make an effort to spend time some time with them every so often.
If you love the way your partner leaves cute notes in your locker, tell them! Express gratitude by doing kind things for your partner, like bringing their favorite snack to school as a surprise.
It’s totally OK to cry if you need to. You might worry that crying isn’t manly, but here’s the truth: everyone needs to cry now and then to get their emotions out. If your partner broke up with you, your first reaction might be anger, but don’t lash out. Your partner had their reasons and you should respect them. Don’t spread nasty rumors about your ex or stalk them obsessively. If you initiate the breakup, be considerate. That means not breaking up with your partner over social media or via text. Tell your partner in person or over the phone. Don’t be cruel. Tell the truth in a direct, but nice, way. Use “I” statements such as, “I’m not ready for such a serious relationship. ”
