This risk only applies to biological children. Adopted children are not at risk for “catching” depression from a parent, though they may suffer because bonding with a parent experiencing depression may be disrupted or they may model the behaviors of a depressive parent. [2] X Research source
While a doctor can tell you about your risk of passing on depression to a child, what is currently known is based on just a few genetic markers and how exactly depression might be passed on genetically is largely unknown. [4] X Research source A doctor can also advise you about whether you can safely take medications while pregnant and refer you to a counselor for emotional support.
Some women opt to stop taking their antidepressants when they decide to have a child. Think about whether you would be able to go for nine months without the medications you are accustomed to taking.
Postpartum depression may cause feelings of despair, anger, or emptiness in the weeks or months after giving birth. Many mothers with postpartum depression feel unable to bond with their baby or struggle with intrusive thoughts about hurting themselves or the baby. Without treatment, postpartum depression can persist for years after giving birth. [7] X Research source Studies have found that therapy may be a better treatment as compared to medication. [8] X Trustworthy Source American Psychological Association Leading scientific and professional organization of licensed psychologists Go to source
Children whose parents are emotionally absent may have developmental delays or behavioral problems.
Some cultures and families place a lot of importance on having kids. If you’re feeling pressured, remember that what works for one person won’t work for another. There are many good reasons to have children, but doing it simply to make somebody else happy isn’t one of them. Being child-free doesn’t mean you’re selfish. Sometimes not having children is the responsible choice. Friendships, careers, volunteer work, and creative work are all meaningful ways child-free people can contribute to the world. In fact, a recent study has found that parents are more likely to be depressed than their child-free counterparts. People without kids were found to be happier than any other group, including empty nesters. [11] X Research source
As a result of living with one or both parents who are suffering from depression, children in this environment are likely to develop anxiety or depression themselves. In addition, these children also have trouble socializing at school, perform poorly in academics, and are more likely to engage in risk-taking activities. Therefore, even if you are a woman who is planning to conceive, the mental health of your partner is just as instrumental in the healthy development of your children.
If you are a male suffering from depression, it’s vital that you and your partner work on the health of your relationship in order to counteract how depression affects your children. If you feel emotionally supported by your partner, that’s great. However, if you do not, it may be beneficial to attend couples therapy before deciding to have children.
If you notice your partner becoming more irritable, withdrawn, sad, or making remarks about suicide, seek professional help right away to minimize the effects on your marriage or partnership and on any children in the household. Call your partner’s doctor or therapist and seek support from family and friends to help you get through these episodes. Have a plan in place in case one or both parents are prone to depressive episodes to reduce the effects this could have on your children. Write down triggers and the best kind of action you can take to deal with or avoid them. In addition to being aware when your partner is feeling depressed, you will also need to take care of yourself so that you can continue parenting when your partner is incapable. Practice regular stress-management with deep breathing or meditation. Get plenty of rest and consume a healthy, nutritious diet. Leading an overall healthy lifestyle can positively impact everyone in your household, even the depressed person.
If you are concerned about having biological children for medical reasons, consider adoption, which carries no risk of passing on depressive genes. On the other hand, think about your partner’s wishes when making this decision, too. Maybe you are depressed, but your partner is deeply committed to having children anyway. Are you willing to manage depression and parenting to make your partner happy? Or, is your partner willing to take on more of the burden of parenting when you are depressed?
Everyone reacts differently to having kids. It’s not a good idea to have a baby in hopes your depression will go away. However, if you really want children, know that having them won’t necessarily make your depression worse.
If at any point you feel like you are relapsing into depression, let your partner know right away. They can help you get the support you need. If you are single, identify some family members or close friends you can turn to for emotional support and day-to-day assistance. If it is financially feasible for you, consider hiring household help during your pregnancy to keep your stress levels down.
Some antidepressants can cause birth defects, miscarriages, and cognitive problems later in life. However, untreated mental health problems can also cause miscarriages, as well as low birth weight, premature birth, and lifelong changes to a child’s brain structure. [20] X Trustworthy Source PubMed Central Journal archive from the U. S. National Institutes of Health Go to source
Support groups related to either depression or parenting can also be a great resource for coping.
