If you find yourself judging, replace those thoughts with positive ones. Say, “You’re human. It’s okay to feel this way. ” Letting these feelings happen without judgment is key to releasing them.
For example, if you are concerned that you’ll never find love again, you might say, “I am worried about the future. ” Don’t try to further analyze the emotion. Simply breathe in and out and let it just be there. It’s a good idea to do your mindfulness meditation while you do something physical, as this will help your body release some of your stress hormones. You could try walking or doing yoga while you engage in mindfulness.
Other ways to practice self-care might be watching a favorite movie, spending a day at the spa, or cuddling with a pet on your couch. If the urge arises to deal with your emotions in unhealthy ways, like rebound sex or drugs, resist the temptation in favor doing more self-care.
Say, “I’m having a hard time accepting the breakup. Can you talk?”
Ask your family doctor, loved ones, or friends for recommendations of counselors in your area.
The last thing you might want to do is forgive the person who broke your heart, but forgiveness is for you, not them. It allows you to let go the pain so you can open your heart for future possibilities.
For example, if you keep beating yourself up because you slept with the person who broke your heart, you might make the choice to postpone physical intimacy in future relationships— at least until you feel sure the person is willing to commit to you. You could also think about how you grew from the relationship. Ask yourself, “What did I learn here? How have I grown as a person?”
You might write something like, “I’m grateful for my friends who help distract me from the breakup, my job because it keeps me busy, and my dog who is a loyal companion. ”
If the person broke your heart, you might be tempted to beg them to come back to you or stalk them online to see who they’re dating. These behaviors keep you stuck. Free yourself to move on by getting space from this person physically and mentally.
Positive social connection will help keep you busy and boost your self-esteem because you’ll remember just how many people truly care for you.
Having a hobby that’s just yours will help you meet new people you have things in common with. It will also help you start building new memories without your ex. This is also a great time to learn something new! Try out a new hobby that has always interested you.
Increase your odds of succeeding by setting SMART goals that are specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and time-bound.
Pick 1 or 2 physical activities that you enjoy and commit to doing them regularly. Regular exercise can also significantly brighten your mood and help you combat depression or anxiety.
