Be straightforward. Say something like, “I know you’ve been really busy taking care of your mom lately. What is the best way I can help you feel less overwhelmed?”
For instance, if your partner has just finished telling you about his difficulty getting everything done, you could rephrase by saying, “It sounds like you’re feeling really overworked. ” Asking good questions is another important part of active listening.
Many caregivers don’t like asking for or accepting help from others, so you may need to remind your partner more than once that you welcome opportunities to help them out.
Offer to take over some caregiving duties or watch the kids so that your partner can take a break.
Take care of your own health, too. Both you and your partner will have more energy for your responsibilities and each other if you have a balanced lifestyle. Avoid alcohol and drugs, and encourage your partner to do the same. These substances are hard on your body and mind. Look for constructive ways to relax instead.
For instance, if your partner has been feeling frazzled lately, you could volunteer to take over cleaning the apartment or buying groceries.
Respite care can be sort-term solution if your partner simply needs someone to take over their caregiving responsibilities for a few hours each day, or if you and your partner want to go on vacation and know that the parent will be in good hands. Hospices, home health agencies, non-medical senior care agencies, social services, private nursing companies, senior centers, churches or the National Family Caregivers Association can all provide you with information on obtaining respite care.
There’s no need to plan elaborate birthday or anniversary parties if you’re both busy. Just make it a priority to spend some time together, enjoy a good meal or some wine, and reflect on what you appreciate about each other.
If you are open-minded, your relationship with a caregiver can be just as rewarding.
Express your concern by saying, “I know this is a troubling time for you and the family. I want to talk about how we are going to maintain our relationship. I think it’s important that you have some free time to relax and unwind. Can we try to clear an evening off our schedules just for us? Maybe you can ask one of your siblings to look after your parent during this time?” If you are married or cohabitating, a new situation may also change your household or lifestyle. Caring for a dependent parent may require financial support from your partner. What’s more, your partner may be less available to care for your children or help out around the home. [13] X Research source
You may be able to ask outright, “Can you tell me more about what’s going on? I want to know how I can help. " You can also perform an internet search to learn more. Go to the right sources, such as national health websites, associations, or research foundations to ensure you have a clear understanding. Try some of the following websites: National Council on Aging: https://www. ncoa. org Administration on Aging: https://aoa. acl. gov National Care Planning Council: http://www. longtermcarelink. net/eldercare/area_agencies_on_aging. htm National Association of Area Agencies on Aging: http://www. n4a. org
Find out what your partner’s dependent parent likes. This may involve films, books, or activities like golf or knitting. Find creative ways to connect with them through their interests. For example, you can check out library books and read aloud to them. Or, you can ask them to teach you how to knit.
