Eat your lunch outside the cafeteria if your school allows it. Many schools offer smaller outside sitting areas or let students spend time in the library. Ask your favorite teacher for help in finding new hangouts in the building. Even if you’re quiet in class and feel like the teacher doesn’t notice you, he or she definitely does and will be happy to help you feel comfortable in school. Stay away from where they hang out. If you find yourself dealing with jealous classmates, avoid the areas where you know they hang out. While this may not be entirely possible, you can minimize your interactions with them by making a note of where they like to hang out.
Secure your spot by volunteering. Most schools allow students to help out if they’re interested. For example, you could ask to be an office aide or a teacher’s aide during his/her off period. This way you could have time away from your classmates as well as an opportunity to build a relationship with adults on campus who can help you. If you like to read a lot, you may be able to find a nook in the library. Check with the librarian if you feel nervous. You might say, “Hi, I’m feeling stressed and would like to calm down with a book. Can you recommend a good title and somewhere I can get started with my reading?” If you you’re a star athlete, you may be able to get permission from your coach to hide out in the locker room. You could always offer to help your coach in exchange for spending extra time in the gym or locker room. If you are in theater, offer to organize the costumes so that you can spend some quiet time in the dressing room.
Remember that you can share good news without oversharing. For example, tell your friends if you win the highly coveted part of Juliet in the school production of Romeo and Juliet, but refrain from adding that you’re also top of the class and just got a cell phone upgrade. When others share their good news, celebrate with them before turning the subject to yourself. If you immediately respond to someone else’s success with a comment about your own, then it sounds like you’re trying to one-up people.
When you start to feel like your classmates are jealous of you, challenge those beliefs and try to look at the situation from a different angle. [5] X Research source Take on the view of a person outside the situation and think about how they might interpret your classmates’ behavior. For example, you could pretend that your friend is in your place and coming to you for advice. What would you tell him/her? Consider their jealousy as a compliment. While feeling singled out can feel hurtful, remind yourself that your classmates are seeing your positive qualities or achievements.
If you feel like their jealousy is getting to you, remind yourself that you can’t change who they are, so worrying about the situation will only cause you more hurt. Don’t personalize someone else’s views of you. While it may feel like how your classmates think of you is important, what’s more important is what you think of you.
When you go on school-sponsored trips to compete in sports, arts, or academic events, plan to have fun with your friends during the times between competitions so that no matter who wins the top prize, you have a great trip. If your classmates still give you a hard time about bringing home the win, turn the conversation back to the fun activity you planned. If you have a class, club, or other situation that puts you in contact with your jealous classmates, ask a friend to be around for you to lean on for support, even if you’re just texting them. Knowing that you have a friend who wants the best for you can help you ignore those who are jealous.
Oftentimes, we get so focused on one way of thinking that we forget that we are not mind readers. You don’t know what someone else is thinking, so allow yourself to believe people are thinking positively of you. When in doubt, ask your classmates how they are doing. That way you will find out if something is bothering them.
If you win an award or position at school, you may experience jealousy from friends as well as your other classmates. When this happens, remember what motivated you to go for your goal in the first place and all of the work it took to get there. Celebrate the effort that your opponents also put into working toward their goal because they may have put in the same amount of work that you did. Congratulate them for all that they did accomplish and encourage them to work alongside you moving forward.
Start a support group at your school. Found a club to help you find other students who share your interests. Volunteer to mentor other students.
Ask yourself why you want to speak about an accomplishment of yours. Does it fit into the conversation? Did it just happen recently, so it’s all you want to talk about? Is your classmate interested in hearing about it? Answering yes to these questions means that your accomplishment is probably relevant to the situation. However, if you only want to talk about it because you feel insecure and want to make yourself feel better, then you may be bragging. Don’t boost yourself up by putting others down.
Congratulate your classmates when they win or receive a high grade. For example, compliment the students who finish the chemistry experiment first by saying, “Wow, you guys did a great job. Today’s lab was really tough!” Make a point to see something good in your classmates, and let them know that you recognize those good qualities. When someone wears a cute outfit or a new pair of shoes, say something like, “Oh, I saw those shoes in the store window! They’re so cute. ”
If you are team captain, remind your jealous classmates that you are all there to win. If you are the star in the play, help your classmates focus on putting on a great performance by pointing out that you’re all needed to put on a great show. If you are working on a group project for a class, tell the other student that you’re happy to be working with them on your shared task and that you know that the two of you will create an awesome product. You could say, “Hey, I’m glad we get to be partners on this. I bet our project will get an ‘A’. ” Strive to see the best in others so they can recognize their own value. This can help lessen any jealousy.
Ask yourself why you would be jealous if your roles were reversed. Consider your classmate’s feelings. Are their goals and needs going unmet? Do you have something that they lack? Figuring out why the other person is jealous can help you figure out how to make the situation work for both of you. [16] X Research source
