Make a list of the types of daydreams you have, and what you think the function of this fantasy is. For example, you might identify that you frequently daydream about conversations with friends, which helps you predict what might happen and practice how to respond. Another example is if you have daydreams about buying a home, this may help you think of a brighter day and have hope for the future. Ask yourself, “what is the purpose of my daydreaming in general?” Do you daydream to escape, distract, make yourself feel better, or pass the time?
Recognize how often you daydream. Set your alarm for one hour. Keep a tally of how many times you drifted off into a daydream for that hour. For example, the moment you notice you are daydreaming, write a tally mark on a piece of paper, and so on. This will increase your awareness of how much you actually daydream. Sometimes it may take you a few minutes to realize that you were in a daydream and that is okay, just tally each time you notice that you were drifting off.
List the negative consequences associated with your rich fantasy life. This list could include things like: less time spent with family or friends, falling behind in school due to not being able to stay focused, not being able to get all work done due to being distracted by daydreams, and friends and family feeling like I am not listening to them because I am daydreaming.
Signs you may be daydreaming include: losing eye contact with someone during a conversation, having difficulty focusing on your current task, not remembering what was just said in a conversation, thinking thoughts unrelated to the current situation, and having imaginary conversations with people or imagining events occurring in your head.
Question the utility of the daydream. Ask yourself, is this daydream helping me in some way?
Choose boundaries that, when crossed, signal you to stop daydreaming. Some of them might include intimacy, spending large amounts of money, or extreme violence. Sometimes when you are lost in your own dreams and it is wasting your time, just look at your watch. Keeping a watch is a reminder telling you that how precious it is for you make the most of this moment because it won’t be back ever again!
One example of an imagery exercise is to close your eyes and imagine yourself in a safe place. [12] X Research source This place may be a beach, your bedroom, a church or any place that you may feel safe, secure, and relaxed. Imagine how it feels in this place. Notice the temperature, the air, how your body feels, and what other sensations and feelings you have. Imagine what is smells like and sounds like in your safe place. Are there other people in your safe place? What are you doing in your safe place? Stay in your safe place until you are fully relaxed and ready to open your eyes. Online resources can help guide you through imagery techniques. [13] X Research source [14] X Research source
Try stretching. Reach for the sky as high as you can without feeling uncomfortable. Then spread your legs apart while standing and reach toward the ground (just as far as is comfortable for you). You can do jumping jacks, run in place, or shake your arms. Try anything active that is safe and appropriate for the place and situation you are in.
Try giving yourself something you like such as a piece of candy or another snack. You can even give yourself a 5 minute break from your work as a reward. Taking appropriate breaks actually increases productivity overall. Use this time to do something you enjoy such as playing a game or texting a friend.
Contact a psychologist (PsyD, PhD), marriage and family therapist (MFT), or psychiatrist (MD).
Try to eat a piece of fruit that you enjoy while focusing on how it feels, looks, and tastes. Use resources online to learn about mindfulness and try mindfulness techniques. [22] X Research source
Name some of the different objects in the room and their different uses. You could name some color or animals that you can think of. Remember not to spend too much time doing the grounding technique, or you are simply using it as another form of daydreaming. Limit yourself to about 1 minute, and then go back to what you were previously doing.
Develop a sleep schedule (a bedtime and wake-time) and sleep at least 8 hours per night. Try relaxation and breathing techniques to help you fall asleep at night.
Try going for a walk or a stroll down the street. Do something you enjoy for a few minutes, eat a snack, listen to music, or watch something on television.
Grab a pillow, stuffed animal, or stress ball that you can fiddle with. Some people find that listening to music while working on simple tasks helps them focus. [31] X Research source It serves as a partial distraction for the mind, so it can focus on what is important.
Do something that inspires you such as: hiking in a beautiful place, meditation, looking at art, etc. Try exercise such as: biking, hiking, sports, dance, aerobics, and yoga. Avoid activities that may increase daydreaming such as watch television excessively. Watching too much television could possibly lead to decreased creativity and increase daydreaming behaviors. [32] X Research source
Pick someone that you know very well and feel very comfortable with. Then, ask them if they’d be available to answer their phone and chat with you if you’ve become particularly engrossed in a daydream. You can ask friends or family to alert you if they notice that you are daydreaming. This will help to keep you accountable and increase your awareness of your attention-span.
Have a schedule and stick to it. If you find yourself daydreaming, get up and leave the situation or do something productive. If you drift into a daydream, gently bring yourself back to what you were doing before your mind wandered. Try to be accepting and non-judgmental of yourself.
