This lack of responsiveness is one reason for the difficulties that some autistic people face in securing and keeping employment, and making friends. Keep in mind that even an extremely unresponsive child can probably still hear you; they just don’t have a way to communicate yet. Therapies such as RDI and RPM can help them engage more. [1] X Research source
Some school programs offer various degrees of “mainstreaming,” in which autistic children spend time in regular classrooms. Depending on your child’s learning abilities, this may be a good idea. Don’t force your child to spend time with bullies or unkind children. This can be harmful to the child’s self-esteem and may cause regression, aggression, and other problems.
Don’t punish/criticize the child or push them to do something if they aren’t comfortable, because they’ll associate social interactions with negative feelings. The child should feel respected and be able to meaningfully say no.
Confusion of pronouns. Autistic people may confuse “I” and “you” regularly, for example. This is part of the language learning process, so don’t worry. Literal thinking. Autistic people may not understand figures of speech, jokes, and teasing. Receptive language difficulties. Even if a child has a vast knowledge of vocabulary and syntax, they may not process spoken words well. You may need to repeat yourself or write things down. Frustration. These difficulties can be very frustrating!
AAC can help a child communicate in words, even if they can’t speak. [4] X Research source Don’t feel bad if your child never learns to speak. Nonverbal autistic people can be very happy and successful in life, like Amy Sequenzia. Your child may learn to communicate very well in alternative ways, such as sign language, typing, facilitated communication, and more.
In general, it’s best to avoid making your child feel too awkward. During these stories, appreciate what your child is trying to convey, and ask a question or two if you want to understand better. Avoid pretending to understand, because your child can probably tell you’re faking it. Instead say “I don’t understand, but I care and I’m glad you’re talking to me. "
AAC can help bridge the gap if your child isn’t ready for speech yet. It’ll teach them the basics of reciprocal communication (which lays a good foundation for speech), allow them to express themselves, and help get their needs met.
Frustration over a lack of communication. Imagine having something important to say, but being unable to form words or coherent sentences. This feels incredibly frustrating, and your child may act out. Sensory overload. Autistic individuals can become overstimulated when too much is going on in a room. [6] X Research source Bright lights and loud noises may be very upsetting and painful. This can lead to meltdowns (which look like tantrums, but aren’t done on purpose) or shutdowns (which involve passivity and withdrawal). A desire not to do something. When pushed to do something they don’t want to do, your child may throw a fit. Last resort. If a child doesn’t believe that you will respect verbal or alternative communication, they may act out due to the belief that it is the only way to be acknowledged.
Make it clear that you care about what’s bothering them, even if you don’t know what it is. Help your child calm down. Allow them some quiet time, or offer to use some self-calming strategies together. Figure out which strategies work best for your child.
Make a doctor appointment. Sometimes SIB is related to pain. For example, a child who hits their own head may be experiencing pain from a toothache or lice. Solving the medical problem may make the SIB disappear. Researchers also believe that biochemicals play a role. During self-injury, endorphins are released, which inhibit the individual from feeling much pain while making them feel happier.
Some of the best sources of vitamin B6 include sunflower seeds, pistachio nuts, fish, poultry, pork, beef, prunes, raisins, bananas, avocados, and spinach. Some of the best sources of calcium include milk, cheese, yogurt, spinach, kale, okra, collards, soybeans, white beans, and calcium-fortified juices and cereals. Always consult a doctor before altering a child’s diet.
Say something like “You’re hurting your legs. Could you massage them instead of hitting them?” Remember that many autistic people don’t like the idea of hurting themselves. Work with your child to find alternative ways to stim. For example, hitting one’s head could be replaced by rapidly shaking the head. Search the internet to see what substitutes autistic adults have found for their SIB. Be consistent. Autistic children need to know that self-harm is not appropriate or allowed, that you will always be there to help them handle it. Work with other caregivers and teachers so that everyone uses the same approach.
Special interests can help build confidence and expertise. They may even turn into a great career someday.
Implementing a new routine can be difficult, so be patient. It will take some time for your child to understand the routine and realize that it will remain the same or similar every day. Explain the routine to your child, and use a picture schedule to help them predict events. Your persistence will pay off – once the routine feels natural and internalized, your child will feel better.
Older autistic children may enjoy setting up their toys in scenes. Toys such as Legos can be good choices for an autistic child.
Assume that your child is struggling, not intentionally misbehaving. For example, instead of “my child won’t tell me what’s wrong,” think “my child can’t tell me what’s wrong. " This attitude can help you focus on helping, instead of punishing.
Make sure your child knows that you love them, autism and all.
If your child continues misbehaving for attention, even after you ignore the bad behavior, calmly say “Screaming is not going to get you what you want. If you want something, why don’t you talk to me or type me a message about it?” Being explicit, and offering a better solution, clearly communicates that the behavior is ineffective.
The most important aspect of this technique is consistency. If your child suspects that you may not follow through, he or she is unlikely to stop the behavior. Consistency makes it clear that you mean what you say. Only use punishment as a last resort.
It is okay to casually let your child know that a stim looks odd. However, don’t pass judgment or try to stamp it out of them. The stim may be very important to them. Let them choose whether it’s worth the effort to redirect it or not, and give them your full support either way.
Trampolines, exercise balls, tree-climbing, swimming, recreational sports, and going on walks can help hyperactive children get the stimulation they need, so they can sit calmly during school. Keep plenty of fidget toys around. Your child may not sit still, but mild/moderate fidgeting can be enough to help them focus.
Eating enough food is more important than eating nutritious food. Eating a fairly balanced diet is more important than eating a wide variety of foods. See if your child can handle eating gummy vitamins if their diet is very limited.
Note that autistic children may struggle, particularly, with mixed-up foods like stews and casseroles. Autistic children often like to touch and taste individual ingredients before deciding whether or not to eat them, and these dishes make it difficult for them to do so. Offer seasonings on the side, so that each person can season the meal to taste. For example, if your wife likes spicy spaghetti and your daughter cries when given spice, place the spice shakers on the table instead of mixing spice into the sauce.
For example, consider making homemade pizza with your child. You can have fun kneading and tossing the dough, make faces with the vegetables, and taste throughout the process. Eliminate certain tastes or textures as you go – if your child hates the texture of chunky tomato pieces, puree them. Your child may point out certain ingredients as “gross” or “scary. " This can help you learn more about their sensitivities.
Try to incorporate small fish, meats, fish oil, and cod liver oil into your child’s diet. You can also add beef to the diet, as this supplies carnitine, which helps in the digestion of EFAs.
It is especially important to avoid sugar at night, when it may disrupt your child’s sleep. The same goes for caffeine – don’t give your child anything that is likely to keep him or her awake.
